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Setting Boundaries for Children

March 7, 2018

I want to talk about the boundaries we draw for our children when it comes to exploring. I want Eloise to grow up to respect things around her. Conversely, my head always comes back to the adage of Sleeping Beauty: If the king had just let her know what a spindle was, she may have never pricked her finger because she wouldn’t have been so curious. I’d love to hear your two cents, where do YOU draw the line? Do you think you should teach them everything right off the bat? (ie we don’t pull things out of cupboards.) Or allow them a little harmless exploration? Or somewhere along the scale? How does teaching them one way or another affect their development? I want to know what you think! #keywordharmless #illeatyouupiloveyouso • #motherhoodthroughinstagram #unitedinmotherhood #uniteinmotherhood #throughachildseyes #thesearethedays #realmomtogs #documentingmotherhood #ig_motherhood #thedarlingweekend #awanderfulchildhood #aheadofthecurve #dailyparenting #mom_hub #hurrayforplay #babiesdontkeep #featuremama #thesugarjar #motherhood #motherhoodunplugged #inspiremothers #ohheymama #cutebebee #bestofmom #UMH_kids #parenthood_unveiled #our_everyday_moments #oneyearold #12monthsold

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I want to talk about setting boundaries for children when it comes to exploring and where we draw the lines.

I want Eloise to grow up to respect things around her. Conversely, my head always comes back to the adage of Sleeping Beauty:
If the king had just let her know what a spindle was, she may have never pricked her finger because she wouldn’t have been so curious.
I’d love to hear your two cents, where do YOU draw the line? Do you think you should teach them everything right off the bat? (ie we don’t pull things out of cupboards.) Or allow them a little harmless exploration? Or somewhere along the scale? How does teaching them one way or another affect their development? I want to know what you think!

Yesterday I posted about setting boundaries to your little one’s safe exploration around the home and wanted to what I gathered from some of my favorite responses here:

ashemerson518  We allow lots of exploration (certain cabinets and drawers are ok, others are locked). With a 10 month old it’s still hard to convey why a No is sometimes necessary (like not eating dog food?), but I know it will get easier with time.

jenniferatkinson  I always let Aiden do harmless exploration, but if he could hurt himself I either put baby locks on the cupboard or told him NO when he got too close to something he could pull down or climb on. It gets easier! Usually we would only have to tell Aiden “no” a handful of times before he got the message. My nephews were a lot trickier though – they would constantly push boundaries. One time my sister-in-law saw one of them literally climbing the fridge. Like, scaling it ??‍♀️

hug_a_booboo Nothing teaches better than experience. But as parents, our first priority is to keep them safe. Too safe will handicap them so let them explore and learn, but always under the watchful distant eye if love.

brittsbabes I like to let them explore when they’re as little as Eloise, but obviously not if she can hurt herself… they are little sponges so they pick so much info up!!

ahelms Flexibility and boundaries are both equally important! I don’t have to say much…you’ve seen my parenting style plenty of times ? I will say, they understand more than you think, even though they can’t quite verbalize things yet! So I think creating boundaries and saying “no” or whatever version of “no” you want to use, is super important in raising a child that everyone will enjoy being around…you know what I mean…pretty sure we’ve talked about it.

karinamtz6 I believe it’s a matter of balance and just common sense. Letting them explore in their own terms but at the same time always keeping an eye to avoid any dangerous situation… At least that’s how I always do it with my students(10monthsold-2yolds) and that’s how I’m doing it with my boy (it’s a lot more difficult when it’s your own child tho?). I think we sometimes underestimate babies and their ability to learn things on their own, so Id say let them explore in a supervised way?

shastawho I try to divert her attention away from certain precarious things. Like, I don’t want her to open the cabinet that is full of ceramic plates, but I do want her to learn how to open cabinets and what they’re for…so she gets to open the cabinet with special “baby” things inside (kitchen towels, toys and pots and pans that I don’t care about!).
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beemarieeeeeeee doing a mixture of both. I think being adventurous is a great quality so I want to encourage that while being safe and keeping boundaries. We went to Hawaii when she was seven weeks old I was worried about the seven hour flight out San Francisco, but she was an angel. Just had to remind myself that despite having a new bundle of joy I couldn’t allow myself to lose my sense of adventure ?

larisa_cheban I definitely want them to explore, learn something new everyday but of course if I know it’s something that may hurt them I tell them to stay away!

davisjimenezfam I’m here for the comments because my little one is 5 months old and I’m sacred that I’ll be too *dont do that , don’t touch that* ? but at the same time I want her to explore and learn on her own you know?

_michelleawilliamsI too am very curious about this! I try to judge every situation based on if it’s dangerous/physically harmful. I try to keep a safe place for her to explore and not say “no” as much when she’s there!

laurenandbearsI’ve definitely learned to pick and choose my battles with Isla. If it’s really dangerous I stop her but if I tell her a piece of food is spicy or hot and she still grabs it and takes a bite, well, lesson learned for her. That being said I still have to say no and don’t do that dozens of times a day since Isla likes to test her limits

alifesetfreeI honestly think it’s a balance. And I think it changes with time. I used to be way uptight when my oldest was younger and am much more relaxed now. And I think its different per family ?‍♀️

themilkandmoscatoI want my daughter to learn that there are consequences to actions whether they be good or bad, but that she be the light in the world and to see things as good and positive, even in the world today. To hold her close enough, that if something truly harmful comes in her reach I can protect her, but letting her learn and understand the world around her. Such a tough question! But kind of learning as we go along… she’s definitely curious! {so scary!} lol

(note: let me know if you don’t want your response posted here and I will happily remove it! )

 

 

 

BEST BABY PRODUCTS FROM A FIRST TIME MOM SERIES: Lorena Canals Rug

December 12, 2017

We recently received a machine washable Lorena Canals rug and it’s been a real game changer for us as far as utility and home decor. Each rug is individually handmade with a loop technique. They are 100% cotton and completely non-toxic.

We have never had the opportunity to have rugs since we have a dog. For some reason, while Sophie is potty trained, I could never break her of the habit of thinking that rugs are not the same thing as grass. With the colder season and having a crawling baby in the house, not having a soft play area was out of the question.

You may have noticed we used to have a play mat in our living room but I quickly became tired of our living room looking like a children play area all the time. When you think about it, if we have three kids two years apart (theoretically), and they play on the play mat until they are four, that’s eight years of a foam mat on my floor. No thanks!

I love aesthetics and the play mat just wasn’t cutting it. I’d like to be able to put away the toys at the end of the day and when having guests over and have my living room look like a polished, stress free and nice space. Putting away a play mat at the end of everyday and pulling it out in the morning is unreasonable.

On the other hand Lorena Canals has so many beautiful options. Each one is more beautiful than than the last and there are options that are much more nursery specific and others that would look great in your living room too! My favorite detail are the braided tassels.

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For the record, our Lorena Canals rug fit the bill perfectly. A gorgeous rug that I can put down without concern for Sophie. In fact I have already thrown it in the washing machine and have had no problem with the wear and tear and have experienced no shedding.

I would recommend getting the lining that goes with it just to add a little extra padding and prevent any slipping around. Our Lorena Canals rug is a little more pliable than your average rug, in order to fit into the machine, so it has a higher chance of movement. The padding remedies this easily.

Bonus: They actually also sent me a pompon blanket in nude and it is easily one of my favorite throws.  Please get yourself one! It’s a super stylish very high quality.

 

Welcome to our New Home

June 24, 2016

Not just a house, but a place that we plan to share date nights, entertain our loved ones, decorate and grow our family.

Buying a home has been a dream of mine since I was a child. Some part of me knew that it was not only a way to truly love where you live but also a great investment; don’t ask why I was thinking about investing as a kid. When I was in middle school I remember saving all my lunch money and waiting until I got home to eat because I was putting my pennies into my piggy bank.

My parents finally helped me open a bank account in high school and I had immediately set it up to auto-deposit $50 a month, or whatever I could afford, in to my savings account. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE to shop, but as soon as that money was removed it was out of sight, out of mind. I never touched my savings. “Just pretend that money doesn’t even exist.”

I know that it was a priority for Andrew too. Buying a house in the Bay Area isn’t easy, especially when you want size, location and a good price. The housing market is at a peak right now, but rents in the area are almost equivalent to mortgages and when we found the place we loved we knew, despite the process that buying a house is, we were making the right decision.

We have already painted the living room and moved our stuff in. The walls were peach before, and the furniture in the two pictures below is from staging.

Old living room

old living room

Painting the house, grey and white are much more our taste. 🙂 Or mine at least, and I think Andrew typically likes my style; and let’s be real, I don’t think he has much of a choice. At least we don’t have to worry about that. We opted to paint the shelving unit white because we felt there were too many different colors of wood. This was no easy task, I could have done my homework better (lesson learned) but the wood didn’t grab the paint very well so my mom and I probably put several coats of white before it got to an acceptable state. Happily, the result really amplifies the light in the room and looks great with our books and decor. Can’t wait to add lots of plants!
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painting the living room

homeowners

Here is a make-shift cozy nook we set up while waiting for our couch to arrive. Sophie loves all the new light in the house.

Cozy Nook

We will post new changes to the house as we make them. It’ll be slow since we soaked all of our dimes into buying the actual property. 🙂